Pain, Love, Doubt, Beauty, Death, Wonder… and all the others that come to mind, dependent on my state of senses!
So here we go, committed to being healthier, cutting sugar by 70%, carbs by 50% and shitty attitude by 92.6%, here goes!
Attitude is THE key to a new trajectory, to manifest it in a meaningful manner for a significant period IS crucial, this so conscious actions/processes and ‘headspace’ become subconscious.
This shift in attitude is a must in breaking old, grey, compromised thoughts and ideologies. There is too little left of substance, to meager a vestige, BUT there is potential and hope… Deep in the darkness there is always the promise of light, and what it can bring! And I hunt the light in 2017!
So much potential and technically it was a good year, and yet… it could’ve been so much more, 90% of the blame lies squarely at my feet though. You know when you sabotage yourself, like a typical Jeckyl and Hyde soap opera. Gotta find a way to believe in the ‘positiveness’ as a default, not as a temporary respite… but I dunno how! Frustrating as hell, and the facade is so tiresome. Not about being unhappy but when one sees the potential and it keeps languishing, one gets rather peeved!
If you consider integrity as a defining characteristic and only you can know whether it’s you or a facade of you that exhibits that integrity, then maybe it’s outside your grasp, and you’re wasting too much time trying to bullshit yourself…
Have you ever thought quite specifically about whether you actually believe in yourself, what it means if you do, but also what consequences a lack of true faith in your ability to action your life into what you want it to be means? It’s tougher than you think cos unfortunately there is always some dependency on how we engage with the world and those around us…
And if they (be it directly or indirectly) are at odds with our ‘actioning’ well then we always tend to compromise, and in that compromise we will always be worse off cos we as the ‘actioner’ will lose a bit of our ‘us’ and the world and/or the others only compromise on perception or process, nothing unto themselves.
So we often lose, bit by bit those ‘special’ bits of ourselves by default just by trying to stay true to ‘our faith in ourself’.
Gotta keep fighting the good fight, avoid the grey, it ain’t you!
Though I’m not always sure what that means, compromise seems so essential these days, without it we are more true to ourselves but at the expense of surviving the world we ourselves created…
not sure why I chose that title, just came to mind and it sounded appropriate though I am not sure why… Like those 6th sense moments where you’re not sure why something is relevant and/or important but your gut says so, and we trust it.
Not that I intended this post to be ‘heavy’, actually quite the opposite, cos I feel rather light of heart today, not that I often feel that way enough to write though. However, today is a good day and I don’t acknowledge them often enough, so this is just a credit note for the good days, may many more follow, and our acknowledgment of them!
easy to have it when all goes according to plan, convenient to forget it when things don’t, and then to blame for our own shortcomings… Just saying.
When you should hold on to it tighter during tough times, not take it for granted during the good times and use it as inspiration when we’re honest enough with ourselves to admit our shortcomings… Just saying!